There and Back Again

Hi friends,

Thanks for being so patient with my lack of updates since Wednesday. The past few days feel like a whole week.

To start with, I'm home from the hospital again and grateful. Now backing up to Thursday morning...we decided to leave my PICC line in because it was still functional, and there was some concern about the possibility of dislodging the blood clot if the PICC were to be pulled out. After an iron infusion, a visit with the nutritionist who formulates my TPN, and my first Lovenox shot, I was discharged that evening. Diane Kummer and Patti Brown drove all the way up to Baltimore to pick me up which was so helpful for my family, as they have a number of medical needs right now.

I was told I would have to take Lovenox injections twice a day and then eventually transition to Warfarin (oral blood thinner) which I would stay on as long as I had a PICC in my arm. This presents a whole new set of challenges and mountains to climb, but I'm asking the Lord to give me faith that He IS ordering even these details for good. He knows how it will all work out.

I arrived home around 10:30 Thursday night and after my TPN had been running just a few short minutes both my lines completely clogged. They had been working fine a few minutes before, and I was at a loss as to what to do. I couldn't drink enough to hydrate myself and now had no dependable way to get in my nutrition and hydration. I also started experiencing a small amount of bleeding under my skin (a concern with blood thinners), so I had to call the doctor on call, but she said to just watch it for the present.

Friday morning I tried flushing the lines again but to no avail. My doctor's nurse told me I'd have to come back to the ER since having a clot added a greater risk to everything. So I started packing again, not knowing how long I'd be there.

God truly provided for me by giving me a triage nurse who used to be a PICC nurse and was able to work with my lines to see if she could get them working again. After several unsuccesful attempts, she put in another IV and sent me to x-ray. My mom eventually arrived, and we found ourselves in the exact same room where we had spent Tuesday night. The PA on the other side of the desk did a double take when she saw us. The nurse injected a declogger into my lines which did its work for an hour or so and after that the PICC was once again functional! She also helped me with my Lovenox shot, and we talked with the ER doctor about beginning Warfarin.

I was discharged once again, and my mom and I arrived home around 10pm last night. So grateful I didn't have to stay longer. Despite the drama of the past four days, this has actually been my shortest hospital stay yet.

Today I have had a difficult time getting myself to take my injections, but God has been so patient with me as well as others who have to bear with my emotional messes. Lately, it has felt like every time I start to make progress with something I hit another wall or fall off the horse again, and it's hard to believe I can keep going and find a way through all the added complications. Yet, somehow, in the midst of all this mess, God is here, and He isn't caught off guard or surprised by any of it. How can THIS be the plan? My heart asks this a lot, but He asks me to trust Him still because He knows the way, and He is the best Guide.

Thank you all for your prayers. I cannot thank you enough. They will continue to be such a help in the days ahead as I try to navigate through these stormy seas. It's a good thing I have a Captain who knows where to take me. Just pray I don't go kicking and screaming.

Love you all!