Another Brief Update

Dear friends, I know this update is much overdue already. Thank you for praying for me regardless. God has been so faithful to uphold me and sustain me through some deep waters over the past few weeks. Last week, my doctor confirmed that although he has seen significant improvement with my Lyme disease and coinfections, the latest difficulty is that I seem to have developed a significant issue with some type of Candida/yeast/fungal overgrowth which has been wreaking havoc in my body, making it more and more difficult to get in nutrition. Even fresh vegetable juices make me sick, and it is a tricky balance figuring out how to get in calories, while not feeding the bugs which love to eat sugars, starches, grains, dairy, etc. (all the foods that help you gain weight quickly!).

My nutritionists have been working with me very closely and have been a wonderful help to me. I have been taking an antibiotic to fight the bugs as well as other treatments. Despite all this, my system is very weak, and it is becoming increasingly difficult to get nutrition into my body. I could say more, but for now here are ways you can pray:

• For the ability to eat and take in calories, despite how my body reacts to food which can be quite severe.
• For the bugs to get under control and that we would have wisdom as to how to best attack them at a rate my body can tolerate.
• For the ability to digest fats and even begin to eat meats again.
• For perseverance, hope, and faith regardless of what comes.
• For clear wisdom and direction for my parents, nutritionists, doctors, and myself.
• For grace to deal with the die-off effect as the bugs are killed and my body tries to clear out the toxins.
• For supernatural healing in His timing.
• For God to be glorified in my weakness and as He makes a way through the morass of all the pieces involved and the counsel we have received.
  

Thank you, thank you, thank you! I have felt your prayers through some very dark days. I do not know what the rest of the day holds, but I know my God does. He is teaching me some hard lessons about faith right now, but they are so good.

And He IS answering prayers. He has brought me this far, and He is not going to desert me now. He is worthy of our full trust.

If it had not been the LORD who was on our side…then the flood would have swept us away, the torrent would have gone over us; then over us would have gone the raging waters. – Psalm 124:1, 4-5

Blessed are those whose help is the God of Jacob, whose hope is in the LORD their God. – Psalm 146:5

It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man. - Psalm 118:8

One Step at a Time

Dear friends,

Thank you all for continuing to stand with me through the hard times. Over the past week, I have been working closely with a nutritional coach as well as another nutritionist. I also recently started a new medication. God is sustaining me, but I would not be honest if I didn't say that the battle is very difficult right now. Almost anything I eat doesn't work with my system, and I am fighting to maintain my weight with the limited food choices I currently have. It is especially difficult to get up each morning and face the day, but God is teaching me to wait on Him one moment at a time. I know He is enough for me.

I would love to write more but don't have the strength at the moment. Thank you for praying. If you could continue to pray that He would provide wisdom and light for the path ahead, and give me perseverance I would be so grateful.

He has delivered me again and again. Can I not trust Him to do so once again?

I love you all.

"Behold, God is my helper; the Lord is the upholder of my life." - Psalm 54:4

Quick Update

Hello friends,

Been struggling more the past few days and trying to start a new plan with my nutrition coach tomorrow morning. It requires doing things that I haven't done in some time, so I would be grateful for your prayers.

The battle is tough, but God's promises are true no matter what I feel.

Thank you all for caring and praying. How I need it. I am so humbled to have friends like you who never tire of carrying me to the throne of grace.

Every cave that you're in—wandering along, feeling the rocks, stumbling, stepping, bumping your head—every cave that you are in is a tunnel that opens into glory. It opens into a day like today in Heaven, with the sun shining, and the grass green, and the waters flowing—as long as you don’t sit down in the cave and blow out the candle of faith. - Piper

Always Faithful

Dear friends,

Thank you for being so patient with me and my lack of updates once again. Since I last wrote, I came down with a cold/cough which had me fighting in a different way for a while, but I have come through most of it now. It was a wonderful opportunity to realize how much God has blessed me in keeping me from “normal” sicknesses. This was probably only the second time I’ve had a cold in the past year!

Praise report! Last time I updated you regarding the struggle I was having with the acid in my esophagus. Well, God has graciously lessened the severity of this issue, and I am so grateful! I know your prayers played a significant role in it. It continues to play a part in the overall picture but nowhere near the level it was a few weeks ago. And my swallowing difficulties have also improved.

The daily battle has grown more difficult lately as my body struggles to digest the foods I eat. A few weeks ago, I removed raw dairy from my diet due to a concern raised by the CDC that it might present too much of a risk for my body right now. As much as I would love to be able to handle pasteurized dairy, it is more difficult to digest due to the good enzymes that are destroyed during the pasteurization process. I am hoping to try introducing pasteurized goat kefir and yogurt in the weeks ahead. In light of this change, I’ve had to rely heavily on rice products and almond butter in order to meet my calorie minimum each day, and my body is no longer tolerating these well. I’ll spare you the details, but the hardest part is that, beyond the digestive distress, it is resulting in a significant amount of brain fog, disequilibrium, weakness, mood issues, and a host of strange symptoms. It has grown more difficult to get out of bed each morning, and it is particularly difficult to keep eating the foods that aren’t working , while at the same time realizing that if I don’t my weight will slip backwards again.

At the moment, I am consulting with a few nutritionists and hoping that we will be able to come up with some other options for foods I can tolerate better while still obtaining the necessary calories.

How to pray:

• That God would be magnified in my weakness and inability.
• That I would cease from striving for control and protecting myself and instead live fully surrendered to the Lord, trusting Him to meet ALL my needs and to be my Shepherd, Provider, and Father.
• That He would keep me in His perfect peace causing all fear to flee.
• For faith to believe His promises and cling to Him at all times.
• For wisdom and direction on what foods to eat and what supplements to take.
• For faith for whatever plan I am given and for the ability to carry it out.
• For grace to keep taking another step and to get out of bed each morning and trust God to carry me through the day. I am often more focused on how hard the road is rather than on His promises.
• For healing for my digestive system and whole body.
• For the ability to tolerate pasteurized goat kefir & yogurt (really helps with meeting my calorie goal).
• Ability to gain more weight and to eat even when feeling bad.
• For wisdom regarding when to begin a course of antibiotics and the ability to swallow the tablets and eat enough with it.

Thank you all so much! I look forward to sharing with you how God works in the days ahead. He is always faithful!

And He said to his disciples, “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat, nor about your body, what you will put on. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing. Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds! And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? …Instead, seek His kingdom, and these things will be added to you. - Luke 12:22-25, 31

We cannot guess in which way deliverance can possibly come to us, but the Lord knows, and He will lead us till we shall have escaped every danger. Happy are those who place their hand in that of the great Guide and leave their way and themselves entirely with Him. He will bring them all the way; and when He has brought them home to glory and has opened their eyes to see the way by which He has led them, what a song of gratitude will they sing unto their great Benefactor! Lord, lead Thy poor blind child this day, for I know not my way! - Spurgeon

Prayer Request

Dear friends,

Thank you for your prayers. God continues to uphold me in countless ways. Just a quick request before I hope to move into further updates over the week ahead.

Today, I am praying about various decisions related to trying new medications and am very aware of how much I need the Lord's guidance and help to know which way to go. There are so many opinions, but He has never failed to lead me. Thank you so much for praying with me.

Also dealing with a great deal of discomfort, difficulty eating, and lack of sleep related to some newer GI issues right now. In particular, my lower esophageal sphincter (what closes your stomach off from your esophagus) is continually open, causing the acid to erode my esophagus, etc. There is not necessarily any way to "fix" this other than to manage it through medications, supplements, nutrition, meal sizes, etc., but we can always ask for healing. :)

I take hope today in God's promise to give wisdom to those who ask for it. Thank you for praying with me.

With much love,
Charissa

"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him." - James 1:5

Beyond My Strength

For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and He will deliver us. On Him we have set our hope that He WILL deliver us again. You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many. - 2 Corinthians 1:8b-11

Dear friends,

These words from Paul’s second letter to the Corinthians have taken on new meaning for me over the past several days. I have found myself continually faced with the reality that I cannot hold myself up. God is the only One Who can and Who can deliver me. And He has been faithful once again! I am so quick to doubt and fear, yet He remains ever true to His Word and His promises.

The past week, and especially the past several days have held some of my hardest moments yet. It has been a moment by moment fight. Yesterday, my dad took me to see the physician who has been treating my Lyme and coinfections as well as other areas. I expected to hear I was having a healing crisis and just needed to persevere, but instead, my doctor gave me the startling news that I was much improved even from the last time I saw him just a month ago! His examination revealed that my Lyme and coinfections are mostly gone as well as my Epstein-Barr and other viruses. My liver has improved, and even my adrenals are thought to be functioning a little better than before. All in all, he thinks my progress is good and encouraged me to continue with the treatment plan on which he has had me.

Well, you might think that hearing these things would be cause for great joy and gratitude, but as I lay there on the examination table, I burst into tears. This just did not fit with how my body felt in that moment or how difficult the past several days have been. As I reflected on this, I realized how quick I can be to put my hope for help in a person or particular treatment rather than in the God who created me and knows exactly what is going on inside of me, no matter how confusing it may appear to me. Doctors and medicine are gifts from God and used by Him to bring help and healing, but ultimately, my only hope is Him.

In the moments that have followed, God has been helping me to thank Him for the encouraging report that the doctor gave me and the incredible progress that has been made. At the same time, I have been wrestling with the realities of my remaining physical struggles and the onslaught of confusing symptoms and significant obstacles. Often, the battle is simply to endure another moment, but I am learning I must fight to rejoice in my “sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us” (Romans 5:3-5).

And so, rejoice with me in the incredible answer to prayer that my Lyme and coinfections have been dealt with, and my body is now attempting to recover from their damaging effects and begin to function again as it once did! This is an answer to your prayers, and it is not something to take for granted. It is significant.

At the same time, would you pray with me that God would show me, my parents, and doctors if there are any other steps to take in regards to my digestive system and the increasing struggles I have faced of late? It could simply be “the darkness before the dawn,” but we want to be faithful to pursue anything that would be important to address right now. When doctors don’t have answers, and the pieces grow too complicated for me to sort through, I am brought face-to-face with the reality of just how dependent and helpless I truly am. This is not something that I can plan my way out of or figure out how to avoid the discomfort. I am desperately in need of my great God to give light for the next step and strength to take those steps, one at a time. He continues to show His incredible faithfulness in enabling me to eat and endure. And, no matter how hard it has gotten, He has not allowed the waves to overwhelm me.

This past Sunday, my pastor warned us of the danger of allowing our opponents to grow bigger in our eyes than our God. I realized how I have allowed this to happen in my own life when it comes to my health and the daily onslaught of symptoms and fears. These have often grown bigger to me than my God, but the truth is they do not even possess a fraction of His power and authority. He is ruling this very moment over every cell in my body and “sits enthroned over the flood” (Psalm 29:10a). He can bring order to anything in my body that is not right, and nothing is too difficult for Him (Jeremiah 32:17).

And so, I am asking Him to increase my faith, to give me His peace, and to allow me to see His hand at work in wonderful ways in the days to come. He is my healer, and I can trust Him to lead me through the maze and fog of symptoms, opinions, treatments, and fears, and to hold me up when I cannot hold myself up. Thank you for standing with me in prayer and for reminding me of what is true again and again. Already, I can join with all of you in giving thanks “for the blessing granted [me] through the prayers of many,” and my desire is that in the days ahead I would once again be able to rejoice with you in these words as I see God’s hand answering your prayers for sustaining grace, faith, joy, peace, guidance, healing, and restoration of health. He is more than able!

Thank you all so much.

“Ah, Sovereign LORD, You have made the heavens and the earth by Your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for You.” – Jeremiah 32:17

Note: I recently posted a quote on my other blog that greatly encouraged me last night. I hope it does you as well!

Follow-Up

Thank you all for praying. I am so grateful for your prayers. I was able to receive some therapy for the hernia, but at this point, it is difficult to tell what's really going on down there. There are just so many potential factors and confusing symptoms that I can only cast this upon the Lord while continuing to talk with the doctors and practitioners who are helping me.

A fuller update is headed your way shortly!

Bless the LORD, O my soul,
and all that is within me,
bless his holy name!
Bless the LORD, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits,
who forgives all your iniquity,
who heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit,
who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy,
who satisfies you with good
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. - Psalm 103:1-5