An Update

Dear friends,

God is so faithful. He is always at work. I have some encouraging news to share! For the past few months, I have been seeing an MD who also uses some alternative treatments. He has been treating me for Lyme disease since the infectious disease doctors determined that I am presently too weak to undergo the traditional antibiotic treatment for Lyme. Well, last week I had my first follow-up and learned that my Lyme disease and coinfections have begun to improve. He also noticed that I have grown stronger and put on some weight since he last saw me. He attributes this to the treatment he's been giving me for which I am extremely grateful. I also know this is the direct result of your prayers and the faithfulness of God. Thank you. I hope this encourages your faith. And one other praise report – recent bloodwork shows that my white blood cell count has entered the normal range for the first time in a few years! There are other things to watch, but that is a wonderful answer to prayer.

As encouraging as it was to receive this piece of news, the doctor also told me I have a long road ahead, and there are many areas that we need to begin addressing now, especially with my digestive system. In his opinion, the faster I can go through these treatments, the quicker I will see improvement. Because it can be challenging for my body to handle these all at once, I am in need of wisdom to know how fast to proceed. I recently began a new treatment and hope to begin a few others in the weeks ahead. I am set to return for a follow-up in early February, and in the meantime, my primary care is monitoring me and watching my labs.

Despite receiving this wonderful news, I have taken a downturn over the past few weeks and have found myself facing ever-changing sets of symptoms. In particular, it has become more difficult to eat in light of the way my body responds, but God is using this to cause me to lean harder on Him. Patients that have been treated for Lyme by this doctor often undergo what is known as a "healing crisis" – an intensification of symptoms for a set period of time before improvement comes – so that may be a part of what I am facing right now.

Thank you for your prayers in response to my last request a few days ago. I have felt them, and God has not allowed the waves to be higher than I can bear. Also, I have continued to keep dairy in my diet and am working rotating it throughout my week. Thank you for praying!

If you would like to know how you can continue to pray, here are the most significant areas:

• For faith and peace in the knowledge that His Word and His Truth are GREATER than all my physical needs and especially my every fear. That I might rest as a little child in the assurance that He is holding me.
  
• For wisdom and courage to continue to eat each meal and know how to best get in all the calories I need while at the same time seeking to minimize the negative effects I experience after eating.
  
• For greater strength, weight gain, and relief from these new symptoms.
  
• For healing for my digestive track, organs, and entire body.
  
• For grace as I continue with these new treatments and go through potential "healing crises."
  
• For renewed hope each morning and faith to move through my day, knowing that He walks with me and expecting to see Him working good on my behalf.
  
• That each moment of desperate physical need would press me into God in such a way that He becomes more real to me than any suffering or physical need. He is my life.
  
• That He would be glorified and made beautiful in the eyes of all through what He is doing in me. That "Christ will be honored in my body" (Philippians 1:20).
  

Thank you, dear friends. A day does not go by in which I am not reminded that I am the undeserved recipient of your faithful prayers and care. You are precious gifts to me.

At Christmas, I am reminded once again that we have a God Who has been faithful to fulfill His promise of sending us a Savior. Can we not trust Him to fulfill every promise in His Word when He has already done the greatest?

"For I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ this will turn out for my deliverance, as it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain." - Philippians 1:19-21

P.S. I still am without a cell phone, so email and my house phone are the best ways to reach me.

Prayer

Dear friends,

I have much good news and encouraging updates to share with you, but I'm feeling too sick to type it out right now. Just wanted to put up a request for your prayers in a special way tonight, as I've been feeling much worse over the past few days and need endurance and peace.

Thank you so much. God hears your prayers, and He is SO faithful.

But as for me, my prayer is to you, O LORD. At an acceptable time, O God, in the abundance of your steadfast love answer me in your saving faithfulness. Deliver me from sinking in the mire; let me be delivered from my enemies and from the deep waters. Let not the flood sweep over me, or the deep swallow me up, or the pit close its mouth over me.

Answer me, O LORD, for your steadfast love is good; according to your abundant mercy, turn to me. Hide not your face from your servant; for I am in distress; make haste to answer me. - Psalm 69:13-17

Wow...

Dear friends,

You all are amazing. I am speechless. Seriously. Shortly before bed this past Thursday my dear sisters, Tiffany and Laura, presented me with this package.

They went on to share how they had secretly contacted friends and collected birthday/encouragement notes for me. I have never received so many cards before! I haven’t counted yet, but I will soon. Here’s a picture of what I found inside….

The timing of this gift could not have been more perfect. Receiving a gift like this at the end of a particularly difficult day meant more than any of you could know. I was completely surprised, blown away, greatly humbled, and wonderfully blessed. It is amazing to see the diversity of people represented – old friends, new friends, those I thought I’d lost touch with, parents of my friends, and friends of my siblings. If you sent me a note, I hope you are reading this now. Thank you. God used your words (or will use them if I haven’t read your note yet) to bring me great comfort and encouragement. I don’t deserve it, and He is teaching me more about the true meaning of grace through receiving this gift.

I have only read a few so far and have considered spreading them out over a few weeks and pulling them out whenever I am especially in need of a bright spot. So, although I may not have read your particular note yet, I most definitely will at some point soon. I simply cannot tell you all just how much receiving these has meant to me.

Finally, I want to thank my sister, Tiffany, for her heart for taking this on for me. She has walked beside me through this season, and I am SO blessed to call her my sister. The same goes for Laura who helped make this possible and has been a continual encouragement to me. And I want to thank Robert, one of my dear little brothers, who collected letters from friends at church and asked his friends to get involved. I am so blessed.

I know I am going to return to these notes and the Scripture verses and words of encouragement again and again over the days ahead. I am continuing to make physical progress, but the past few days have held a greater degree of difficulty for me. It is so sweet to see how God timed the delivery of this gift from each of you to arrive right in the middle of my low point. Thank you. I just don’t have the words.

I hope each of you had a wonderful Thanksgiving recounting His blessings and gifts. I am coming to learn that even our thorns are precious gifts. God is always up to something far greater than we can see or imagine while we are in the midst of the pain. Let’s keep giving “thanks in all circumstances” (1 Thessalonians 5:18), for we have a God who is all-wise, all-loving, all-good, and perfect in every way. Even when our way is dark, He has not forsaken us.

(Just a quick P.S. – I have been overwhelmed by the love and care I continue to receive from each of you and would so love to be able to respond personally to each of your emails, Facebook messages, cards, and phone calls, but my ability to do so right now remains greatly limited. Please know that I dearly love each of you and am SO blessed by hearing from you. I hope to eventually get back to you all. Thank you for understanding and being so gracious. Also, I am still presently without a cell phone in case you have been trying to contact me that way.)

Another Prayer Request

Dear friends,

Yes, I'm actually posting twice in one day! Just wanted to add another prayer request while I was thinking of it. I've been eating a lot of dairy lately (mainly heavy cream, butter, and kefir) and was just hoping to try milk and yogurt this week, but my system is struggling with it right now. My dad encouraged me to ask people to pray that I would be able to continue to eat dairy, so I'm putting that request out there. Our God can do anything!

Thank you so much!

An Update

Dear friends,

I figured it was high time I gave you all an update. Once again, thank you for your patience. God has been so good to me! How quickly I forget all the mercies He has shown and how far He has brought me.

Praise Reports

• I am still weak but my strength is significantly greater than even just a month ago. It is so easy to take this for granted until I hit a moment of greater weakness and am reminded of how much He has done.
• My weight continues to remain stable and gradually increase. I have been able to take in the required amount of daily calories and have even majorly surpassed my goal on some days!
  
• I have been able to participate in several important events including the wedding of my dear cousin, Bethany, which has been such a gift.
  
• I have been able to introduce some new foods to my diet such as kefir and several nuts & seeds.
  
• I am usually able to take short walks in the morning.
  
• God is teaching me so much about waiting on Him to fulfill His promises and is answering specific prayers.
• I recently heard that a group of friends have each taken a day out of the month to commit to fast and pray for me. How immensely humbling, and what a precious gift! I am sure that the good I am experiencing is a direct result of those prayers.

Prayer Requests

• That God might enable me to trust Him more and walk in freedom in every area of my life.
• For my faith in His promises and His Word to increase and grow so that all fears are set to flight.
• That I might become a student of God's character rather than my circumstances.
  
• For wisdom for a doctor's appointment coming up this week.
• For wisdom and grace to continue to persevere with my nutrition and daily food choices.
• For more sleep and that the sleep I get would be more restorative and deep.
  
• For discipline and strength to implement a particular treatment that my nutritionist has asked me to do this week.
• For increased strength, weight gain, and restoring of health.

At church this past Sunday, Tim Kerr said the following: "God wants us to pray bigger, bolder prayers. We ask too little. God is honored when we pray prayers that cannot be answered unless He sends His Spirit." I was so challenged by this and by another quote he went on to share from Arturio Azurdia: "What are you asking God to do, that only God can do, so that when He does it, only God gets the glory for it?" (If you have a moment, I'd encourage you to listen to this message. It will challenge your faith immensely.)

Sometimes I ask but not with faith. Not expecting an answer. But He DOES answer! And it is exactly when I have no ability of my own to help myself or those dear to me that I am pressed to cry out to Him and find Him more than able to do far beyond all I ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20). The same is true for you, my friend. Let us ask Him for great things. Not just when we are aware of how helpless we are but every day. For without Him, we can do NOTHING (John 15:5).

I look forward to sharing with you all just how He answers these prayers in the days to come!

I have loved you with an everlasting love;
therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you.
Again I will build you, and you shall be built.... - Jeremiah 31:3-4

For still the vision awaits its appointed time;
it hastens to the end—it will not lie.
If it seems slow, wait for it;
it will surely come; it will not delay. - Habakkuk 2:3

Treasures of Darkness

Hi friends-

For some time now, I have had it on my heart to share more of what God is both teaching and doing in me during this season. Since the purpose of this blog is to communicate health updates, I’ve decided to reserve these other things for a separate blog. It has actually been in existence for some time, but I haven’t been faithful to add fresh content. I’m sure that most of you come here to find out how I’m doing and to learn how to pray for me, so I will continue to keep this blog reserved for that purpose.

If you’d like a window into some of what God is doing in me during this time then you can take a look over here. I can’t promise that there will always be new material, but I do want to be faithful to share as I can.

SO grateful for each of you! I am overwhelmed by your care.

An Update

Dear friends,

Thank you for being patient with my infrequent updates! As much as I desire to post more often, I am continually learning that my limitations are greater than I think. I am humbled that you would continue to pray for me and carry me on your heart during the long silences.

I have MUCH to praise Him for! There have been some significant changes over the past few weeks.

• Last week (beginning on Wednesday) I noticed a considerable difference in my overall strength and ability to carry out normal functions and was able to move around more than I have in a long time. Even more significant, though, is the greater faith, joy, and hope that rose up in my spirit that day. Though I am weak and each day brings its own challenges, I have continued to see an underlying difference and noticed that my spirit has a greater hope in the Lord and ability to take things one moment at a time.

• Despite a few setbacks with my food and weight over the past few weeks, I have amazingly been able to put on a few more pounds again, so I’m continuing to make slow and steady progress in that area.

• God sustained me through the new trial diet and then made it clear that it didn’t seem to be the right fit for where my body is currently at. I’ve returned to working with my other nutritionist and am continuing to try new foods. I hope to consider the other program at some point in the future when I’m a bit stronger and at a better weight.

• This past Saturday I was able to attend a friend’s baby shower and a wedding back-to-back! (Since I don’t get out of the house much other than for church on Sundays, this made it a special treat, and my mom was so kind to go with me.)

Prayer Requests

• That I might continually abide in Him, for I am very aware that I can do nothing apart from Him.
  

• For rest in the Lord’s love and care.
  

• For wisdom for me, my parents, and my nutritionist as we make daily decisions on what I should eat, what supplements I take, how much to rest, etc. and grace to deal with the symptoms that come with/after eating.
  

• That I would continue to make progress in gaining weight and strength.

• For healing in God’s perfect timing.

As I was writing this post, a song I used to listen to back in high school came to mind. I wanted to share a portion of it with you:

My God has given me
More than I ever dreamed
A precious family
And friends who care for me
Why should He love me so
Oh that I’ll never know
I am unworthy of it all
Still He keeps on givin’ to me

God's been good to me
Oh, God's always been good
God's been good to me
Oh, God's always been good

This perfectly describes my situation. I am “unworthy of it all” but “still He keeps on giving to me.” I am weak. I struggle with fears and doubts on a daily basis. But I have a God who is so much bigger than my weakness. Bigger than my sin. He has always been good to me and will be good every day of my life, whether that be a day of sickness or a day of health. This life is so short. Soon I will see my Maker face-to-face. At that moment, I will wonder why I ever had a moment’s doubt.

Regardless of where you may find yourself today or what you may be facing, I pray that you, too, would know this hope and joy. He is so good to us. He has given us His only Son and secured for us a place in His family for all eternity.

This God—His way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; He is a shield for all those who take refuge in Him. – Psalm 18:30